onces and one

sucks~!!!
suddelyn received someone msg while i was half slept this afternoon
her:xiao jie!
me:yes..?
her:your * surname is wad oh?
me:why..?
her: isit *..?
me:yes.why..?
her:he chase my fren oh.hmm.
AND MANY MANY MUCH MORE CONVERSATION AND WE HAD A LITTLE TALK AFTER THIS
what the f*ck
once and once.one and one
and you're still the same
don't even know how to change it
so so hard to maintain.believe and holding in everything now
i can't stand.facing.handle.controlled
totally lost in few minutes times
cried while i was on phone.more harder after i hang down
cried while i was driving out alone
cried while i am typing this
can't stop
i can't just standing there all alone
forcing myself to sleep.but i can't fall asleep.*hell
just sit at the front of my pc
read all those of my past blogger post
never reply any coversation
off my phone.hiding myself
i can't understand and can't get everything clearly and truthly at all
it's just keep on restarting.repeating
never even change
damn*
you got your own FRIENDS.i got my own FRIENDS too
what a lousy reason and explaination you had giving me
i don't know how i goanna to forgive all this
cause it's just non-stop.keep on repeating the same things once and once
what the hell.*

for my baby girl...
lose one more kg again today
so you.not need to on diet le
im not on diet but keep lose my weight .*(
damn
untill now 9.19pm
im still haven't having any any meal since last night after dinner at bistro untill now
no appetite to eat at all
even water also no
now i just realise
i don't know how many hours.i think since afternoon untill now im still haven't drink any water yet
so so so down
no choice
i had nothing can say and describing with my life right now
what a bad day and bad eighteen i have going though

pissed me off~!!!
she not need a boyfriend.she just need a REALMAN*OFF